| # | Quote |
|---|
| 1 | On mothering: To me, life is tough enough without having someone kick you from the inside. |
| 2 | If you want to break up with a man, tell him, 'I love you. I want to marry you. I want to have your children. I want us to grow old together and be with each other forever.' Sometimes they leave skid marks. |
| 3 | I wanted to have children, but my friends scare me. One of my friends told me she was in labor for thirty-six hours. I don't even want to do anything that feels good for thirty-six hours. |
| 4 | I suffer from peroxide phobia. Every time I've gotten near a blond woman, something of mine has disappeared. Jobs, boyfriends...one time an angora sweater leaped right off my body. |
| 5 | Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie. |
| 6 | Before I met my husband, I'd never fallen in love, though I'd stepped in it a few times. |
| 7 | In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. |
| 8 | I don't swear. When I do, my husband gets out the tape recorder. Once, when I was first doing comedy, there were only five people in the audience, so I did my whole act swearing every other word. All the waitresses and people at the bar ran in yelling, 'Rita's swearing! Rita's swearing! Everyone come!' |
| 9 | My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head. |
| # | Fact |
|---|
| 1 | Ongoing performances at the New York, New York Hotel and Casino at the Cabaret Theatre [June 2003] |
| 2 | Release of her book, "Naked Beneath My Clothes: Tales of a Revealing Nature". [1992] |
| 3 | Currently performing in the showroom at Harrah's in Las Vegas, NV. [October 2006] |
| 4 | Release of her book, "Turning the Tables: A Novel". [2006] |
| 5 | Release of her book, "I Still Have It -- I Just Can't Remember Where I Put It: Confessions of a Fiftysomething". [2008] |
| 6 | Release of her book, "Rita Rudner's Guide to Men" [1994] |
| 7 | Release of her book, "Tickled Pink: A Comic Novel" [2001] |
| 8 | She and her husband have written (April 2013) the sitcom, The Rita Rudner Show for BBC Radio 4. |
| 9 | Her first novel "Tickled Pink" was written in 2001. It is a semi-autobiographical tale about a dancer who moves to New York to find success and turns to comedy. |
| 10 | Hoping for her own sitcom like other comedians in the 1980s, Rita did at least a half-dozen pilots but they never came to fruition. |
| 11 | Moved to California in the late 80s and met husband Martin Bergman, an Englishman, whom she met when he was producing stand-up comedy shows. Together, they wrote the film Peter's Friends (1992) that co-starred then-married Kenneth Branagh and Emma Thompson. |
| 12 | Moved her five-year act at Las Vegas' New York-New York casino to Harrah's on October 6, 2006. |
| 13 | Kooky, slightly vapid-looking American stand-up comedienne whose specialized brand of neurotic comedy was inspired by idols Jack Benny, Woody Allen, and Bob Newhart. |
| 14 | Originally moved to New York from Miami at age 15 to study ballet and pursue a career as a Broadway dancer. She decided to go for comedy because women's stand-up was a less competitive field in 1980. |
| 15 | First big break was being booked on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson (1962) in January 1988. |
| 16 | Her second novel is "Turning the Tables" published by Shaye Areheart Books in 2006. |
| 17 | She and husband Martin are among the writers working on a musical "Natural Woman," based on the music of Carole King and Gerry Goffin. |
| 18 | She and Martin Bergman have a daughter, Molly, adopted in 2002. |
| Title | Year | Status | Character |
|---|
| The Daily Show | 1997 | TV Series | Herself |
| Dennis Miller Live | 1994-1997 | TV Series | Herself |
| The Real Las Vegas | 1996 | TV Series documentary | Herself |
| Late Night with Conan O'Brien | 1996 | TV Series | Herself |
| Rita Rudner: Married Without Children | 1995 | TV Movie | Herself |
| A Comedy Salute to Andy Kaufman | 1995 | TV Movie documentary | Herself |
| Late Show with David Letterman | 1993 | TV Series | Herself |
| Comic Relief: Baseball Relief '93 | 1993 | TV Movie | Herself |
| The Chevy Chase Show | 1993 | TV Series | Herself |
| John & Leeza from Hollywood | 1993 | TV Series | Herself |
| Comic Relief V | 1992 | TV Special | Herself |
| Bob Hope's Four-Star Christmas Fiesta from San Antonio | 1992 | TV Special | Herself |
| The Royal Variety Performance 1992 | 1992 | TV Movie | Herself |
| Pebble Mill at One | 1992 | TV Series | Herself |
| 10th Annual Montreal Comedy Festival | 1992 | TV Movie | Herself |
| Guest Night | 1992 | TV Series | Herself |
| Bob Hope's America: Red, White and Beautiful | 1992 | TV Special | Herself |
| The Chuck Woolery Show | 1991 | TV Series | Herself |
| One on One with John Tesh | 1991 | TV Series | Herself |
| The Arsenio Hall Show | 1991 | TV Series | Herself |
| Late Night with David Letterman | 1982-1991 | TV Series | Herself / Herself - Guest |
| George Burns' 95th Birthday Party | 1991 | TV Special | Herself |
| Born to Be Mild Starring Rita Rudner | 1990 | TV Movie | Herself |
| The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson | 1988-1990 | TV Series | Herself / Herself - Guest |
| Comic Relief IV | 1990 | TV Special documentary | Herself |
| The Marsha Warfield Show | 1990 | TV Series | Herself |
| Rita Rudner | 1990 | TV Series | Herself - Hostess |
| Fast Forward | 1989 | TV Series | Herself |
| One Night Stand | 1989 | TV Series | Herself |
| The Pat Sajak Show | 1989 | TV Series | Herself |
| Funny People | 1988 | TV Series | Herself - Host |
| The New Hollywood Squares | 1987 | TV Series | Herself |
| Comedy Club | 1987 | TV Series | Herself |
| Stand Up America | 1987 | TV Series | Herself |
| Women of the Night | 1987 | TV Special | Herself |
| The 9th Annual Young Comedians Special | 1984 | TV Special | Herself |
| The Bob Monkhouse Show | 1983 | TV Series | Herself |
| Catch a Rising Star's 10th Anniversary | 1982 | TV Special | Herself - Comedian |
| Women Aren't Funny | 2014 | | Herself |
| Comics Unleashed | 2006-2014 | TV Series | Herself - Comedian / Herself |
| Marie | 2013 | TV Series documentary | |
| Why We Laugh: Funny Women | 2013 | TV Movie documentary | Herself |
| Home & Family | 2012 | TV Series | Herself - Guest |
| Celebrity Ghost Stories | 2012 | TV Series documentary | Herself |
| Rita Rudner and 3 Potential Ex-Husbands | 2012 | TV Special documentary | Herself - Hostess |
| The Wright Stuff | 2011 | TV Series | Herself - Guest Panelist |
| RuPaul's Drag Race | 2011 | TV Series | Herself - Guest Judge |
| Huckabee | 2010 | TV Series | Herself |
| The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson | 2008 | TV Series | Herself |
| The View | 2008 | TV Series | Herself |
| Rita Rudner: Live from Las Vegas | 2008 | TV Special | Herself |
| Entertainment Tonight | 2007 | TV Series | Herself |
| Comic Relief 2006 | 2006 | TV Special documentary | Herself |
| Skin City | 2006 | Documentary | Herself |
| Biography | 2006 | TV Series documentary | Herself |
| Dawn French's Girls Who Do: Comedy | 2006 | TV Series documentary | Herself |
| Just for Laughs | 2005 | TV Series | Herself |
| The Aristocrats | 2005 | Documentary | Herself |
| The Tonight Show with Jay Leno | 1992-2004 | TV Series | Herself |
| Animal Tails | 2004 | TV Series | Herself |
| When Stand-Up Comics Ruled the World | 2004 | TV Movie documentary | Herself |
| Hollywood Squares | 1998-2003 | TV Series | Herself - Panelist |
| Bitter Jester | 2003 | Documentary | Herself |
| Ask Rita | 2003 | TV Series | Herself - Host |
| Trading Spaces | 2003 | TV Series | Herself |
| Women of Las Vegas | 2001 | TV Series documentary | Herself |
| Great Performances | 1997-2001 | TV Series | Herself |
$950,000
